Happy 18 months Adel Mikail!

Sayang,

You are 1 and half years old today or 18 months old to be exact! The more I get to know you, the more I'm in love with you. At this point of life, you like eating carrots, tomatoes and apples! You like giving Mummy a hard time every morning! You refuse to wake up! And this literally causes Mummy to come in late to the office. Your list of friends includes Dibo, Cookie, Barney, Emmett, Bear-bear and Umbai :)

Raya is creeping up next week! And you, Daddy and I are going to wear a matching ensemble! I can't wait!

On a sour note, Daddy's away in Terengganu. 3rd time this month. I'm feeling a tad bit sad. But it's OK, at least I have you ;)

Love you sayang :)

Mmmmuuuuuaaaahhhh






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Tadpole

I just got back from buying raya stuff for my little sister. She felt so bad and guilty that I bought her things. The truth is I only buy her expensive stuff once a year and that usually happens when raya approaches. After Mummy left, I know my sister doesn't really get the luxury she deserves but having said that, she's not the type that would demand such things either. On that note, yeah, she is nothing like me fortunately. I do feel like a bad sister for not being there for her all the time. I guess that's why I get her good things to make up for what I lack. My absence. But my little sister never once broke my heart or made me cry. She's my little angel. And I would never dream of asking her for things or favor in return for the things that I've done for her.

If I can, I'll give her the world. I know she misses Mummy very much. Her life will never be the same without Mummy. So it's these little things that I can do to try as much as possible to minimise the loss.

My little sister is humble, oh so sweet and innocent. And I love
her to death. I'll love her forever.

Adek, you will forever be my Tadpole :)



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My Second Home

You've guessed it right.






This is my office. For the past 3 years, I should think. This is taken on a good day actually. This is pretty neat for my level. I can have mountains of documents at one time. No matter how often I spring clean, it will turn to mess, eventually. But don't let my confession turn you off. I can be a neat freak if I want to be. In fact, I freak my husband out sometimes at how anomaly I tend to be when it comes to cleanliness. Hehe. Bless him for surviving my antics.

Ok, enough 'me' time, now back to work!


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Want but Can't Have

I want this:

and this:

and this:

and this:

and this:

and this:

and a luxurious vacation here:

But I can't.

Because I'm saving up all my dollars and cents and my livelihood for this:

The "thing"

I'm at work. I'm fasting. But I cannot get this "thing" off my mind. I should have had the "thing" for Iftar yesterday. But I had McD instead. I'm looking forward to Iftar today with the "thing". The "thing" on warm rice is my fave dish in the entire world. Owhhh "thing", wait for me to come home, ok?







This is the "thing" i.e. Sardine masak lemak cili api. Salivating already! Sabar-sabar *grins*. Another 8 hours to go, lol!

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Vietnamese Chicken Salad

Although there's plenty of interesting tasting and looking food at Delicious, I always end up ordering the same thing over and over again. Maybe I'm not adventurous or maybe, just maybe I'm totally hooked up on their Vietnamese Chicken Salad. It has cucumbers, lettuce, green apples, corriander and peanuts and let's not forget, chicken. The salad dressing is divine. It's a mixture of peanut butter and mayonaise. The pictures below were taken at Delicious Bangsar and the one near US Embassy.








I was so obsessed with salads at one point that I attempted to do the Vietnamese Chicken Salad at home. The verdict? Well, it doesn't look the same but the taste is there. On second thought, I think it tastes better than the ones at Delicious, lol! Only because I can chuck in more corriander and green apples and less cucumber in the salad. Here's mine anyway.





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He who makes me feel wanted :)

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Hate

I am full of it today. Responsibilities are meant to be shared. Not to be shouldered by only one person. This is taking a toll on my life. I don't wish to argue about it but it is unfair. UNFAIR. And I HATE it.


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bangkok...not so dangerous :)

i was in Bangkok last weekend. i was reluctant to go there at first because i had to leave adel behind with hubby. it's not that i don't trust hubby. it's just that i think hubby will not be as careful as i would when it comes to taking care of adel. true enough i guess cause adel greeted me at the airport with a bruised face! marah sgt kat hubby for being neglectful! 

so anyhoo, Bangkok was superb! when i first heard the firm was heading there i'm like "huh? bangkok? bosannye. mcm KL je kot". but i was sooooooooooo wrong! it's nothing like KL, well except for the roads and shopping complexes. ok, admittedly, sometimes i feel like i'm in bukit bintang but that's because our hotel was smacked right in the middle of the city so there were lots of shopping complexes and MRT. but it WAS different in so many ways. i will definitely go there in the near future. there's so much things to buy! but this time round i only bought several t-shirts and keychains. and i only bought myself a toiletries bag. things there are so cheap. terbeliak mata sometimes. even the t-shirts at hard rock are cheaper by rm20. 

my fave place has to be chatuchak. there's a lot of stuff there ranging from clothes, food to housing items. amazing i tell you. and again, the prices are so cheap! and the food! omg! so sedap! even the most simplest coconut ice cream tastes like heaven. the tom yam is sooooo sedap! it's nothing like the ones we have here. definitely looking forward to go there again in the future. but my fave discovery in bangkok has to be their ice tea. if you have not tried it, if you have the chance in going there, please try their ice tea. sedap sangat!! i dunno how to describe it. it's nothing like ours, ok! it's much more tastier! a friend of mine told me that you can get the same thing in Sri Ayuthaya here. nanti i go try *grins*.

i think my Bangkok experience was good because of the food *chuckles*. food and shopping makes a woman happy. was i happy? yes i was! even happier to see adel at the airport to greet me walaupon muka mcm kena belasah :p.

i feel like...

CRAP

i just want you to know...

that even if i act all bossy and stressed out at home, i still love you.

that even when i say the harshest words, i don't really mean it and ooh..i still do love you.

i know i've been ungrateful and i whine quite a lot but that doesn't mean that i don't love you.

i am very proud to have you as my husband and i look forward to having more babies with you in the future. provided that adel is ok with it!

MIA

this week has been rather hard on me. hubby's off to Paka for the entire week. adel and I were left to fend for our own selves. work has been more than hectic due to tight deadlines. but i did not really commit myself to work. i'd leave the office around 8pm. that's considered late in this present situation. i'd feel guilty for being late. late in fetching adel up from MIL. i feel like a bad mother. and i also feel guilty for ditching work early and leaving my colleague in despair. uggghh. i dunno, i think without hubby, i am almost paralyzed. i don't have any support. not that i rely on him all of the time but it's just times like this where i really really have to work, he's just, well...missing.

moving on

so we've moved out from the old apartment into this flat. it's super small. the moving part was excruciating. not for me but for hubby and others who helped us in the process. i didn't realized i had so much stuff until we moved out. but i am not by any means, a hoarder. i just have lots of plates, pots and pans and clothes. oooh...and furniture pieces. all were bought to facilitate the old apartment. but in this small flat of ours that we involuntary call home (hopefully, just for a year) all those good things will not be put to good use. simply because there's no space. we are definitely saving up to buy us a house. insyaAllah it will happen next year. either under construction or sub-sale, we have to move out. my head cannot work in such small space. i'm even going on a cooking strike. i will not cook for a year. it's not that i don't like the kitchen. it's just that i don't feel safe cooking (or eating for that matter!) there because it's small and old and smelly.

adel has been sick for the past few days which made me worried sick. i think it all stems out from the whole moving in and moving out drama. kesian dia. he was shivering and all. vomited a lot and even pooped blood. doc said it was nothing but high fever. of course tak puas hati. takkan he had all that because of high fever. apparently the antibiotics had caused him to poop blood. with his temperature rising and stuff, the flat pulak sangat2 panas. not helping in adel's recovery at all. and adel was exceptionally clingy. sbb demam kot. nak pegi mane semua kena angkut dia. haiyooo. had to take EL yesterday because of the little guy. poor thing. kesian tengok dia. alhamdulillah, the fever has subsided a bit. takut ok bila anak sakit! nampak sangat tak pandai jaga!

so moving on, we are trying our level best to be patient and hope for the best to come. even though duit byk abes bulan ni sbb pindah, maxis bill melambung, credit card exceed max..ape lagi. semua benda tak bestlah nak jadi bulan ni..mintak2 dimurahkan rezeki lagi, ameen!

marah sangat

we finally found a new place to rent last week. we have paid 2+1 months rent deposit and 1/2 month utilities deposit. we'll be moving in this weekend. and for the record, this new place is like the last place on earth i would want to live in. but rents in Setiawangsa are just ridiculous. terpaksa. RM1,800 for an apartment?! oklah, condo. but seriously. WTH. the current place costs me rm1,200 per mense which to me is affordable. but rm1,800? that's a big difference ok. and this is only rent. houses nowadays are over-priced. melampau. at this rate, i will never afford to buy a house. maybe if we had found a better place elsewhere i won't moan as much. because this new place of ours is just crap. i hate it. i hate it so much. i dunno whether i can live in it but seriously. i hate it a lot.

we're planning on saving so we could afford a house next year. but if houses are rm800k-rm900k. memang taklah! with the new scheme that the govt has introduced, it only helps those of lower income. what about those middle income earners? kena menyewa je ke? nothing is done by the govt to monitor this outrageous pricing. something should be done. nak suruh orang merempat ke? takkan nak menyewa seumur hidup? even sub-sales are over-priced. maybe it's the location. i dunno. eeeeeee. marah sangat!!!

change

Felt like changing the blog's design and template.

This design here is more appealing to my eyes than the former one.

Hope it would motivate me to write more.

As for updates, we have not found a new place to rent yet. We're still sad and depressed because we have to let go of the current one. 

Sangat. Kecewa. Dan. Menyedihkan.

Dear Sasha :)

Happy Birthday!!!

Ngeee

I'm still around :p.

Busy sangatlaa. Sangat busy. Ooooo...did I mentioned I was busy?!

Work has been tremendously overwhelming but I enjoyed every moment of it. I know. I am a freak of nature. Did fess up to my boss about this unexpected work load but the boss thinks that I complaint too much and that I am not grateful. I hate to say this. But it's true. He said that people give me work (a lot of it) because they trust me. And I should not complaint because this will dilute the trust. So true. So I had to fix my attitude. So now when people throw me things, I only smile and do the work patiently. Because I know, I always gain some valuable experience out of this and it's always good to learn. Hence, I've stopped complaining about work save for the busy part.

We celebrated Adel's birthday a couple of weeks ago. I was excited. As always. Remember Adel's birthday cake which I planned and ordered ages ago? The cake crumbled and collapsed as soon as I arrived home. It was painful. Although it tasted super good because it was peanut-butter and jelly, I had to find a new cake pronto. We went to Bisou, KLCC to acquire a new birthday cake. It was nowhere as perfect or tasty as the one that crumbled. But we just had to settle for it.

Our place was small so everyone cramped in the apartment. I kinda felt sorry to those who came. There weren't enough seating to the extend that people had to sit on the floor. We served penne arabiatta, sheperd's pie, bihun goreng, salad, chicken sandwiches, pavlova, brownies, oreo cheese cupcakes and some other goodies. The event was overall OK and I think Adel enjoyed himself. Despite not having time to sleep during daytime, Adel managed to entertained his guests at night with his antics. Love him. Love him to bits. We had customized jars with jelly drops, ADEL cookies and cupcakes for the adult's door-gifts and we gave alphabet books to babies. I've uploaded pics on my fb btw.

Can't believe my baby is 1. He has grown so big and naughty. He jumps a lot. Runs a lot. Cries when I say "No". But even that, he still manages to melt my heart. Love kissing his neck every morning sebab sangat masam! Oooh Adel..what do I do without you? Seriously.

Hubby pon busy jugak sekarang. He's always off to Kemaman and Lumut every week. It's a pain in the ass really. Not having to see him and having to do everything myself. I do appreciate the bonding time spent with Adel but I still need support. I need hubby around. I cannot do this by myself. I hope YOU are reading this. Although the pay is good and all, is it really worth it?

Oooo..new development, the landlord text hubby yesterday morning. He wants us to move out in 2 months time. WTH. We've done so much to the place and now we have to move out. Apparently the landlord's son wants to move in after getting married. In the meantime, we nomads must find us a new place. I don't mind moving but it's just exhausting, kan? What more since we've done so much to the place. Bloody annoying I tell you. The rent in that area is also mind-blowing. Bloody expensive. How-la? 

Went out last Thursday night to a dinner party with UIA friends to celebrate Shuey! Because she's getting married like next week. I ordered some exquisite cupcakes with "boobies" and "birds" as the main feature. I think it was funny but some did find it repulsive. Ada aku kesah? Hehe. But we had a good time that night and I've missed a lot of friends gatherings so was very thankful for this gathering. To Shuey, many congratulations! No advises, sorry. Because I'm still figuring out my own marriage :p  

So this is what happened to Adel, hubby and I for the past couple of days. You can sense from this post that I am far from thrilled about life at this moment in time :(.

*sigh*

Happy Birthday Adel Mikail!

Dear Adel,

I remembered clearly how your daddy and I felt when we held this in our hands:

Positive!

Excited? Happy? Doubtful? We thought of everything because we were unsure of life. We were unsure of ourselves.

But this is what you turn out to be:

Khusyuk watching Astro Oasis

You turn out all right for a one year old, kan? LOL!

And it all happened in one year and nine months! 

Allah has definitely blessed us with a handsome-looking angel!

And today sayang, you are officially one! Mummy remembered giving birth to you as if it was yesterday. You are worth every cries and pain (so mummy took epidural - I would have tahan the pain for you anyhow you know :p). There are no words that can describe the enormity of love we have for you. You are everything to us.

Happy Birthday to you!

Loads of love,

Mummy and Daddy xx

Cuhrazee

I've been unfaithful to my blog. LOL! I just felt like typing that!

Oklah, I've been super busy. So what's new kan? What more with hubby's new work which requires him to travel a lot, I have a lot on my plate now. It's like I'm biting more than I can chew.

My little champ's birthday is like NEXT WEEK. I am super excited. He's finally one! I had a fantastic time with Adel during hubby's absence. It's like I really bonded with him. He'd lepak next to me when we watch the telly, play around the kitchen area while I cook, nod when asked "Nak shushu tak?", nestled around my neck when dozing off - he's just super cute! We have also started brushing his teeth! Yang, at current, ada tujuh batang tuh! It all started on one fine morning when I was bathing him. We would normally chat on how warm he'd like his bath to be, sekali tuh, when he opened his mouth, it smelled funny and err..stinky! I immediately told hubby and we bought him his very first Oral-B toothbrush and Kodomo Lion apple toothpaste. Aiyoo, anak bujang aku sorang nih!

His party is well on it's way. My sister is helping a lot especially for decorations. The menu should be sorted out soon. The invites was just sent out just now via sms. It's a small party which will be celebrated with close friends and relatives. Am not expecting a lot of guests. Maybe 20 plus-ish. And the apartment is small and cramped, it cannot accommodate huge crowds. So takpelah, nanti dia kawen, I'll try to make the event bigger than mine, LOL!

Too in love with...

 

My friend, Sasha, thinks I'm too in love with my son. Another friend of mine, Aliza, thinks it's OK to be too in love with him but it would create problems later. I have to admit. I am obsessed with him. Like I think about him night and day. Or when he babble or babytalk, I would drop almost everything in an instant just to hear him talk. And knocked my head ever so hard to make sense of what he's saying. Hugging him constantly and jump with victory knowing the fact that he prefers me over his dad. To me, Adel is just the cutest thing ever. I guess that's natural because he is a part of me and I am as much a part of him. So I think it's OK to be obsessed and to be very much in love with the little one.

I have started talking to hubby about having another little one. In fact, I've already come out with a potential name for my future son. Pathetic, kan? I can't help it. I mean, just look at Adel, he's so angelic. Makes me feel like a want to have a basket full of babies. OK, be careful with what you wish *grins*. But am I ready? Was I ready the first time round? Definitely, no. But Adel just takes my breath away. He makes the impossible, possible. The unbelievable, believable. The unreasonable, reasonable. For now, he is my raison d'etre. I love him. It doesn't matter whether it's too much or too little. In this case, it's a tad bit more than just too much. The point is, I love and adore him and there is nothing I won't do to make him feel loved, safe and protected. 

Makes me wonder, would this continue once I start having more babies? Time will tell.